Cincinnatti Peace Corps Wedding Weekend

This month brought our second Peace Corps wedding of the summer. Two wonderful people, Stewart and Bret finally tied the knot in Cincinnati.

I love hanging out with RPCVs. I forget that we're all similar in the way that we're down for anything adventurous, so we started off the trip with walking from Cincinnati to Kentucky. Really, it's just over a bridge, but it was non stop raining with blowing wind and about 50 degrees outside.

Which also then took us to this really cool park along the water which was irresistible and led to going down a large metal slide which was basically a water slide in the freezing cold rain...twice.

Stewart's parents own the cutest little pink cottage I've ever seen in my entire life. I'm not joking. It was just as amazing inside as it was outside too. It was the perfect place to host a wedding, especially when like 30 former Peace Corps volunteers are all together.

 Unfortunately Hurriane Joaquin made for a cold gloomy day, but no one let that stop them from having a wonderful day and a beautiful wedding.

The food was amazing, her dress was beautiful, the people were wonderful, it seriously couldn't have been a better day. It was the perfect excuse to drive 8 hours and see so many people I haven't seen outside of Cambodia, especially since they got married 4 years to the day from when we all swore in as Peace Corps volunteers. Here's our K5 gang sign 4 years apart from each other.

Happy Wedding Stewart & Bret!! Thanks for letting all of us be a part of your wonderful day.

A Peace Corps Wedding

I just realized I never posted about a little trip Hal and I went on over Memorial Day weekend. Two of our Peace Corps friends got married in Kansas so we embarked on the most epic road trip ever. 18 hours each way. I know, we're crazy.

We brought along our trusty companion Trophie to make the drive a little less boring. We stopped on Friday night in Indianapolis to see another Peace Corps friend and got up bright and early on Saturday to make the final 9 hours to the wedding. Thanks to a large accident we literally walked into the wedding with a minute to spare.

All of their tables were labeled with cities where they have lived, which I loved. They seated us at the BMC table, the name of the province where we and the groom lived while in Cambodia. They had a really cool interfaith ceremony with a rabbi and a minister; and had touches from Cambodia and Jewish tradition throughout the whole night; like Cambodian dancing and the most giant loaf of challah bread I've ever seen. It was delicious.

 

He was one of our province mates who we saw all the time, and she was in mine and Hal's village and language class during training, so it was so wonderful to see them come together and get married. And oh my goodness her dress was gorgeous and fit her perfectly.

It was an extra special treat that there were so many volunteers from our group at the wedding. We seriously had such a blast with them the entire night. I can't think of too many things that would make driving 40 hours in 3 days worth it, but this was definitely it. That and the foot high meringue pies we got on the way home.

Expat Diaries: Shoebox Apartments

Today I'm linking up with Chelsea from Lost In Travels for her Expat Diaries. Today's post is all about shoe box size apartments.

Hal and I know a little something about living in small spaces. Where we lived in Cambodia could qualify has a bombin place for one volunteer, but for two volunteers to live in...it was just too small. Now when you look a the picture below of our family's house, you're going to be impressed. And you should, from the outside it looks pretty impressive. Most of the house is actually just open space with nothing in it. Our room was off of the living room.

Yes, I said room.

We shared essentially the master bathroom in the house. Not bad if you have any space that's really yours outside of a bedroom. That was the biggest problem. We shared a room and a bathroom, we had no where to go to get away from each other and our host family.

This is our room. Our bed was actually bigger than the one we currently sleep on.

 And for some perspective of the size of our room, here's Hal in his kroma (traditional Cambodian scarf with 1,000 uses) trying to push back the birds nest that lived in our ceiling and constantly got feathers and icky stuff on our bed. To the left you can see the door to our bathroom and the edge of our clothes line. I am standing outside of our room to take this picture. At least the ceilings were really tall to help the place feel bigger.

Our bathroom. Our bathroom was the best part of our entire existence. We had a flushing toilet. We had running water. You just can't clean yourself well with a bucket shower (dumping small buckets of water on yourself in place of running water). And that butt sprayer, bidet type thing is amazing. Most the time I didn't miss toilet paper. I know, you all just had your mouth drop. Hal and I totally wish we had one of those on our toilet here.

Our bathroom was also the laundry room. See that black bucket on the edge of the picture, that and our two hands were our washing machine.

 Here's our kitchen. We had a small corner of the kitchen that was ours, and the rest was our host family's. We had a small gas run, one burner stove. Essentially a camp stove that we used to cook everything on. Again, running water = way easier to do the dishes. We were SO lucky to have running water. And really, sharing the kitchen was nice. Our host family always invited us to eat with them, even though that wasn't in our rent agreement, and sometimes they would even try the westernish food we made.

Here's our tiny toaster oven. This was a Christmas gift and was amazing to have. It used a lot of electricity to use, so we only used it on special occasions. We didn't have constant electricity, and it was really expensive and generator run in our town, so no one had fridges. Saves space, I guess as a positive. We had to go to the market everyday to get fresh food.

 That open door behind me is our bedroom. Everything I'm standing next to is everything we left our site with. We lived off of all of that stuff for over a year. Not all of this came back to America with us, some of it was left for other volunteers. When you have such tiny living quarters, you learn to not need a whole lot.

It was obviously a little drastic living in such small living quarters, and sometimes I just wanted somewhere to go, that I could call my own and be able to get away from anyone else. But for the most part, it forced us to interact with our host family a lot, since they were right there the moment we opened our door. We had a good relationship with them probably because of that.

But we found a bigger place for the new volunteers that replaced us in our town.

My View, Looking Back on Peace Corps

We've been home for over a month now and looking back at Cambodia makes me feel so nostalgic. Some part of me feels like we're just in America on vacation and that we'll need to go back soon. Some part of me feels so happy to be in America, and some part of me wishes I was still in Cambodia. It switches back and forth a lot which part of me is bigger.

We made such wonderful, hopefully life long friends out of both Peace Corps Volunteers and Cambodians. It's funny looking back now how quickly you make friends in Peace Corps. The joke is that they're government issued friends. But really, you're all thrust into this challenging situation together. None of you has any idea what it will be like, but still all having the drive to want to go see and experience. I don't think anyone can know what it's like to serve in Peace Corps without going. You all have something inside of you saying yes, I want to, and will do this. Maybe that's why you make friends so quickly. You all have that in common. All you have is each other pretty much from day one, from staging when you're leaving America, and together 63 people have to make it to Cambodia. They can split you up in villages and language groups, but you're all in it together. You're all learning and growing and sweating and uncontrollably pooping together.

Everyone has their own experience in Peace Corps. We all have different interactions with host families and host country nationals, but that moment you talk to another volunteer they just get it. They get it in another way that someone who has never served in Peace Corps can never get it. We don't even have to be from the same country of service, that moment you find out you've both done Peace Corps, there's an instant bond. They've gone through the same struggles as you, just maybe with a twist to them.

Peace Corps has been a life changing experience. It was the greatest decision for Hal and I. It's definitely not right for everyone, but it was right for us. It's hard to put into words how it has changed me, but it has, so much. It has changed my view of the world, and my view of change, and my view of what I want my life to be like. I guess the best way to describe it is, Peace Corps opens your eyes, in a very good way. It gives you the opportunity to do service in a sweetly unique way. It gives you the opportunity to get to know your small corner of the world so well, and to explore. I guess that's it. Peace Corps just gives you opportunities, and it's up to you what you make out of it.
Serving in the Peace Corps can be unbelievably hard and frustrating. It can also be unbelievably sweet and rewarding. You have to be strong to withstand those hard days, they often come more frequently than the rewarding ones.

 Serving in the Peace Corps requires flexibility. Things will never go as you plan them to go. You have to be able to take that change of plans, on a really bad day when it's 110 degrees and 90% humidity and the electricity just went out, and your computer battery can't hold a charge, and your family decided to make fire ant soup for lunch. That's just life. That's when you go take a cold bucket shower, climb into your mosquito net in just your undies and say "I love Cambodia" until you believe it.

Khmer or Khmer?

You know the old, potato(po-tay-to) - potato(po-tah-to), tomato(toe-may-toe) - tomato (toe-mah-toe) thing? Which is the correct way to say it thing?

Well, I'm about to educate you on somthing I wouldn't have even known unless I'd lived in Cambodia and learned to speak the langauge, (which is Khmer and not Cambodian).

How would you pronounce the word: Khmer?

Like it looks, Kuh-mer, right?

Except, that's how the french pronounce it...in french.

The correct way to pronounce it is: Kuh-mai.
If you said Kuh-mer to a Cambodian they probably would have no idea what you're talking about.

Normally it's not something that really bothers me, but with the death of King Sihanouk recently there's been a lot of stories about Cambodia in the news, and I have yet to hear one journalist get it right. More than one of them have even lived in Cambodia. Really, guys, really? How can you report on Cambodia and something as big as the Khmer Rouge when you're pronouncing the name of their langauge and culture wrong?

Wikipedia gets it right. [pʰiːəsaː kʰmaːe] 
That other word on the phonetic is the phonetic for the word langauge in Khmer.

Now consider yourself educated and spread the word. Please feel free to correct people when they mispronounce it, and feel free to use me as a very credible reference :)

Soap box Complete.

Adjusting Back to America

Coming home is definitively an adjustment. Seeing all of these people you love, but aren't used to seeing; and not seeing all the people you've come to love and are used to seeing is a weird feeling. It was weird to come back and immediately have to get back to life. Hal started school less than 2 weeks after we got home, and that meant I had to find a job. It was hard to have to face such big things right away, they had seemed so far away while we were in Cambodia.

There are some things that are really hard about adjusting back to the life of luxury and wonderousness that America seems when you're living in a third world country. One thing that's hard to overcome is a sense of entitlement. When you're living in poverty in a tiny village you know you're going to go without things and you dream about all of the things you can have when you get back to America. So it's hard not to expect to just have everything your heart desires once your back. It's hard not to want everything when you see all of this amazingness you haven't had access to for so long.You forget that you still have to sacrifice, especially for the sake of your budget.

When we were first home it was totally over whelming there were so many people to see and things to do, and places to see. There was just so much stuff everywhere. Stuff in the stores, in the houses, in the closets, in the car. There were just so many options it was hard to choose. Sticker shock was intense. I'm sure people got tired of hearing "In Cambodia I could get this for $1!"

It's hard when people ask you about serving in the Peace Corps. Either you say it's good and that's the end, or you'll end up talking their ear off forever. I guess I'm kind of reserved about talking about it in real life because I feel like people will get bored of my stories from Cambodia. It's just hard to explain to someone in any way for them to understand what Cambodia and Peace Corps was like.

We have our own place for the first time in a year, and it made me realize how much I value having my own space. Many thanks to our amazing friends and family who gave us so many things and helped us get settled into our own place. Without all of you our apartment would pretty much be empty and it would be a sad place to come home to. Many thanks to our readjustment allowance which paid for our rent until I got a job, and which furnished our house thanks to ikea and craigslist. It is such a wonderful place to come home to, and that's my favorite part of being back.

I think it will still take time for it to feel like we're here in America permanently, but we're slowly getting used to life back in the states. Hopefully we've brought the good of our experiences back with us. As Hal said, he brought the "Buddhist Zen" back with him, especially on the freeway. That's one of the hardest parts, letting go of the funny things you say and do in Cambodia, but are rather inappropriate in America. It's hard to let go of those things, because it feels like you're losing parts of Cambodia. I guess it's really all about just finding that balance of taking the best of both countries and mushing them into what you love best.

Things I don't want to forget: Memories

I'm a little sad writing this post, as it's my very last things I don't want to forget post. These posts originally started out as one post, and just kept growing as I kept thinking of more and more things I loved about Cambodia and my time there. It has been so great to write them all down to remind myself, and to share them with you. Hopefully you have a little better idea of what life in Cambodia is like. As my last post I'm just sharing memories. Wonderful memories with our host families, co-workers, students, strangers, and other PCVs.

Memories:
-That time the staff in Blue Pumpkin ice cream shop taught us to sing Happy Birthday in Khmer.
-That time we were all falling asleep in blue pumpkin over our carton of ice cream because it was 11p.m. and way past our village bed time.
-That time after a year of telling Bookie that I loved her pajamas, and wanting some, she finally bought me my very own pair.

-That time that those pajamas were way too small for me, but I wore them to greet family at the airport anyway.
-That time we took a 2 hour boat ride back from Koh Rong and the weather was horrible and half the people on the boat ended up throwing up.
-That time we took the night bus (guess I can admit it now) and it scared us into never taking another night bus ever.
-That first time we hitchhiked by accident and the very nice lady we met in the process.
-The amazing people we have met since then by hitchhiking.
-How Hal has taught other volunteers how to hitchhike around Cambodia.
-That time we started counting all of the foreigners we saw coming into Siem Reap and how we told every one else on the touri that we were Cambodian already, and not foreigners. They thought it was real funny.
-That time we went back to visit our training host family and asked my host brother to write "welcome" in Khmer on something and he ended up writing a note about how he loved us :)
-That time Hal tried to jump over a hammock and broke his elbow.

-When we found Christmas lights in our provincial town and that first time we turned off the light and turned them on.
-That time when my students and I were hanging out and they were speaking in Khmer and asked if I knew what they were saying, and I for once did!
-When my students finally sung all of the "12 Days of Christmas".
-When my students sung my dad Happy Birthday.
-When my Host family sung my dad Happy Birthday
-When my students told me that they loved Camp GLOW.

-When my Camp GLOW girls called me and asked if they could come plan their lessons at my house, right then.

-Seeing my girls teach their lessons back in our village, and being so excited to teach the information that they learned at Camp GLOW.

-The unbelievably awesomely khmer presents that my students and family gave us to take home.
-That time I taught my students to say "Supercalifajulisticexpialidocious" for my last lesson to them
-That time I had dengue.

-Spending New Years 2012 on the ocean in the Gulf of Thailand and watching fireworks over the ocean to celebrate the New Year.

-When we went to Angkor Wat for free during sun set, and no one was there, and we ran through an empty courtyard, it felt like I was in a National Treasure movie.

-That time Hal and I tried to wait out the storm in training, but dinner time came and we rode home through the heart of the storm and every inch of us got soaking wet.

-Riding the bamboo train in Battambong and getting caught in a rain storm. We also all ended up soaking wet.

-All of the movie nights we had in our room in training.
-That time we had a jambalaya party in training, and people from other villages came to hang out at our house.
-Seeing that my school director created a place for students from the elementary school across from his house, to come and read beginner English books.

-Watching my co-teacher's wonderful private school continue to expand and grow, all to the benefit of her students.

-That time we tried to learn "The Dougie" and "The Stanky Leg" from the internet.

-Creating a PCV family as the best support system you could have ever asked for, and being able to celebrate holidays and events with them as your family away from home.

I'll never forget my time in Cambodia. It has imprinted itself on me. I can't wait for members of my PCV family to finish their service in Cambodia, and for the shenanigans to continue, state side. 

Saying Goodbye Is Hard To Do

After our party we had a busy last day at site. We said goodbye to our friendlies who came to the party. My girls had their community teaching after Camp GLOW. That was a pretty big deal. They taught for like two and a half hours and they did amazing. They taught another session the next day, after I was gone.

And then they all exchanged pictures from the party and followed me to our wat (buddhist temple). We finally had to say goodbye for real.

I went home and we made sure everything was packed up and we had dinner with our host family. Our host mom had made some of our favorites. MMM she can make some good chicken.

Then we gave out the last of our gifts to our host family. To my host brother we gave him DVDs of cartoons we thought he'd like. I told him he needed to listen to them to help learn more English. To my host sister and host mom I gave makeup and nail polish, and to the family we gave them pictures we took with them over our time there. They really got a kick out of looking at the pictures. Then we surprised them with some of our Cambodian Wedding photos they didn't know we had taken.

I was real sly and asked my host sister to do my nails one last time..with her new nail polish, that I had just given her, real sly. She happily obliged, and after arguing with my host mom over the most beautiful color combination, I ended up with the most fabulous Khmer nails I could have asked for. Colored tips, glitter, and stickers? What more could a girl ask for?

 It was great hanging out with just our host family for one last night. Just the 5 of us as it was most of the time. We were off to bed for our last night in the village. I don't think either of us slept really well that night, we were too full of nervous energy.

 We were up bright and early the next morning with the taxi there to take us away from what had been our home for what seemed like a lifetime, but in fact was only 10 months. Our one toothed Yay came to say goodbye to us. She is just the quintessential Khmer grandmother and I liked her so much. I finally got her to smile and show a bit of that one tooth, the way we recognized her when we first moved there.

Our host sister came with us for the trip to Phnom Penh. She had only been there once, when she was a little girl. She had just graduated and was off to the big city. I thought it was pretty cool that our host parents trusted us enough to bring her down there, and make sure she got there safely.

Our last goodbyes were to the volunteers who came to Phnom Penh to say goodbye to us. It takes a few days to process you when you choose to leave Peace Corps, so we had two nights to visit our favorite restaurants, stock up on the last things we wanted to bring back, and to see the sweet volunteers who came to see us off.

While it was so hard to say goodbye to all of our family and friends, it was probably the most hard to say goodbye to Cambodia. Really, to say goodbye to the experience of Peace Corps and living in Cambodia. It just wiggled it's way into our hearts, and I wasn't quite ready to say goodbye yet. So instead I said I'll see you again.

Parties Are the Way to Say Goodbye

I hate goodbyes. Like seriously hate them. I kind of just keep saying oh I'll see you again before I leave, sometimes knowing I probably won't, just to avoid goodbyes. I wanted a good way to say goodbye to my village and my family, friends, and students there. What's a better way than throwing a party? We threw a party for ourselves because we wanted to introduce our family and my students to some westernness. We invited quite a few people and had a great turnout. Thanks muchly to our three closest volunteer buddies who came and partied and helped out.

We bought the a #10 can of spaghetti sauce and added some spices and cooked up some garlic bread thanks to our #10 can of powdered butter my in laws sent us. Ah the life of trying to make western food in a non western country. They don't really eat with forks much in Cambodia, so we rolled Asian style and everyone ate the spaghetti with chopsticks. Our host mom even let us pull out the fancy chopsticks we brought them from China.
I had recently bought two copies of Harry Potter #1 in Khmer. There aren't a lot of story books in Khmer, so kids don't love reading there. My girls devoured Harry Potter. They spent most of the party watching the first movie, and made sure to get the rest of the movies from me before I left. One of my presents to my co-teacher was some books to start a library at her school. I made sure to include Harry Potter #2 in Khmer.

After eating, we had to of course, take about a thousand pictures.

 I wanted to do something special for them before going away. What means special to me? Dessert. Dessert they've never had before. Cakes in Cambodia are not nearly as tasty as cake like we think of. So I made them a funfetti cake and some delicious cream cheese frosting. Man, it was the first real cake I'd had in a year and it was freaking delicious.

Then my students made me feel so loved. They showered me with gifts. The day before the party some of them asked me if I had a weight limit for the airplane, because they had a gift for me. I kept hearing them say 15 pounds. I was wondering what the heck they had bought, that was that heavy. They didn't buy something that heavy, they were just all amazing and all bought me gifts. Seriously, a teacher couldn't ask for more amazing loving students.

 And then we do only as we know how to do. We danced the night away. My girls from Camp GLOW taught everyone else how to do the macarena. It was pretty ballin.